Return of the Unspeakable Odds
by chibigurl23
Summary: Well, the story of Unspeakable Odds continues! Darien Gray has gone off to the military, and Momo is left behind. Two years of college pass and Amber, Brucie, Ava, Ziggy, Malcolm, and Marlin are ALL here! With the new addition of Puertobello! READ UNSPEAKABLE ODDS FIRST! Read, review, follow, favorite, and remember, this is NOT Vampire Knight anymore :)
1. What What in the Butt

**Hey guys! For all of you who read Unspeakable Odds, this is the SEQUAL! So read Unspeakable Odds first to understand this and tell me what yall' think. :)**

**Return of the Unspeakable Odds  
**

**Chapter 1: What What in the Butt**

**Momo's POV:**

**Two Years After High School:**

Sometimes, you have expectations at a younger age at what you want to do in the future. What your life is going to be like. But sometimes, things change.

You see, I expected to be moving in with my boyfriend whom I'd been dating for practically all of high school. Now I'm moved in with one of my friends, Keiji Inoue. Things can change slowly after a long period of time, or, like me, they can hit you like a rock. Darien, my EX-boyfriend, moved on, and departeg to the military. We decided to forget about each other.

Those of you who already know about this, that was just a refresher.

My phone beeped and I answered it quickly.

"Hellooo?" I asked. It was of course, Ava.

"Hey MooMoo!"

"Ava, you haven't called me that since freshman year."

"Well, not the point, Broski! Go to channel thirty!" She yelled. Since high school ended, Ava had somehow become more of her normal self. I nodded, though she couldn't see it.

"Fine, what is it?"

"JUST LOOK!" I hung up and sat on the couch, Keiji skipping out of the kitchen, sandwich in hand.

"What's goin' on, Mo~?!" I shrugged.

"Ava wants me to look at channel thirty."

"No. DON'T DO IT!" Too late. I changed the channel from Dizzy Network, which Keiji had wanted to watch, the channel thirty.

"Oh my god." I said, putting a hand to my face. My phone rang again.

"I KNOW, RIGHT?!"

"You started a ghost hunter show?"

"Yeah! Have you seen Malcolm yet?!"

"No..." She hung up and I sat down again.

_"Well everyone, this is my sidekick in crime, Malcolm Pawtnics!"_

_"Hi..." _

_"So, now that you know us, let's go investigate the Josaiah household. There have been rumors from neighborhood kids about having weird feeling every time going by the household, and from Harold Josiah, he says he once saw an apparition of a little girl, and was chased by her. Let's GO!" _

They drove to the house and opened the door. Harold had left earlier to give them time to investigate. They walked through the house in silence, until Ava jumped in shock.

"You hear that, Malcolm? Audience?"

"What?"

"THE APPARITION JUST FARTED! YOU SMELL THAT? It ripped ass." Malcolm coughed behind her.

"Sorry... that was me." Keiji shut off the TV.

"This is why I hate her."

"And why would that be?" I laughed as he crossed his limply arms.

"She just..eugh! She's so weird and... and- that studio only gave her the show cause she's a complete idi-tard."

"Idi-tard?"

"Yes." He grumbled. "It's a mix of idiot and tard, if you didn't know, WHICH you wouldn't."

"Okay." I agree. "But didn't you have work to go do?"

"SOME FAT BLONDE CHICK STOLE MY COMPUTER."

"what?"

He nods and re-crosses his arms. "Yup! She straight up won't get off my computer."

"Don't you have a home computer?"

"Yeah. She broke in."

Something jolted in my brain, and my eyebrow rose. "WHAT? Someone BROKE into the house to use the computer?"

"SHE'S PLAYING ONLINE SLOTS."

"GET HER OUT OF HERE!"

He groaned and flopped himself onto the couch. "Don't wanna. But eh, you should get her out for me..."

"why?"

"Well first of all.." He put his fingers together in signal that he was about to give me reasons. "THERES A STRANGER IN OUR HOUSE. And second of all, I'm having a guest over tonight."

"Who?"

"His names Ghenhis Lincoln. He's kind of creepy, but i do like them creepy guys."

"Ghenhis Lincoln?"

"Yeah. Speaking of him, I'm gonna need you to get out tonight..."

I rose an eyebrow in question. "Why-Oh..."

I took my question back quickly, realizing ofcourse what this meant. Keiji was having one of his man friends over for... ehem, Keiji time...

"Keiji time?" I asked dully.

"Keiji loves his Keiji time." He nodded back at me.

"Well great." I groaned, sinking my head. "What am I sposed to do now?"

"I dunno." He paid me no mind. "Call amber, see what she's doing. Maybe you can go down and see the studio, meet a man friend."

I just played with his suggestion in my head, bored with it. Relationships... Well, they just weren't my main priorities in life at the time.

"Alright, I'll see what she's doing." I mumbled, tugging my phone out of my pocket.

"Good girl." Keiji smiled. I punched in ambers number, and not many rings were given before she answered.

"NO BRUCE, FOR THE LAST TIME THERES NO MORE BEER IN THE-"

"Amber?" Her greeting had me shocked. She bounced back quickly.

"Momo? Oh hey."

"Uh hi." I said wearily. "Is everything-... Never mind, I don't care, what's going on tonight?"

"Not alot." She sighed. "Ava's dragging my ass to see her new apartment. Says it's awesome, I know it'll probably be shit, but I didn't say anything."

"You probably did." I scoffed.

"Oh yeah." She laughed. "So I did. You wanna come with?"

"New apartment huh? Yeah alright, better than being stuck around here, count me in. Did you see the ghost hunter thing?"

"Don't even get me started..." She groaned. "On the ghost hunters thing."  
So I didn't even get her started on the ghost hunters thing.

* * *

The door cracked wide open, and in cracked the smell. This terrible, mildewy, smokey mist of just.. eugh.  
Ava led me and Amber in through the door, and the smell surely did match the interior. Gritty brown stained shag carpet, peeling wallpaper that looked as though it was once a cozy cream color. Once.

And scattered about were the furnishings: A torn up couch, an old timey TV, and other things.

"Well..." Ava looked at us with hopeful eyes as she shut the door.

I scratched my head and tried to give her my best smile. "Its... Its very-"

"It smells like dumpsicles in here." Amber hissed, pinching her own nose. Ava glowered her eyes.

"Well scuse me miss... poop rich, I can buy... poop." Ava's insults suck.

"No, it's nice." I lied. "I mean... it could use a bit of sprucing.. Didn't you say Malcom was here?"

She nodded. "We were planning the next haunt to investigate, but Puertebello spit on him so he's in the bathroom washing his face."

"Puertebello?" I rose an eyebrow. "Who?"

"My fat italian room mate. He doesn't like malcom."

Just then, one of the rickety doors slid open, and out came a bulbous tan man in a wife beater.

"EVAH." He shouted. "WHAT DOES ALKACELZER DO." He held up a bottle of alkaceltzer and threw it to the ground.

"IT FELL." He said.

"Thats great." Ava sighed. "Please go to your room Peurto."

"OKAY... NO MORE SCRAWNY KID, RIGHT?"

"No more scrawny kid." She mumbled.

Peurtabello agreed, and wobbled off to his room.

"Dibs." Amber giggled.

"Shut up." Ava pouted.

"He seems... nice." I said, though he was a little... peurtabello-ish."

On that last thought, Malcom sulked out of the bathroom, looking rather unpleased.

"It wont come out of my hair!" He grumbled loudly, combing at his hair with a scrap of towel. "That guy spits like... radioactive sludge or something."

Amber shrugged. "You needed a haircut anyways. You look like a hippy child."

"Whatever." He muttered. "Is peurto-... portashimmy-hooja gone yet?"

"He lives here." Ava said. "At least you don't have to live with a fat mushroom."

"Marvin is enough of a fat mushroom."

"But he's not even fat." Amber argued.

"STOP CONTRADICTING ME." He huffed. Malcom was having a Malcom kind of day, which generally meant bad.

"Okay." Amber sighed. "We saw this place, can I go yet?"

"Where do YOU have to go?" Ava crossed her arms.

"I dunno. Somewhere where fat mushrooms don't run amock, and it doesn't smell like butt. Peace, Im audi 5000."

"No you're not." I grabbed her by her wrist, and pulled her back. "Come on, lets go get burgers or something."

"But what if I get fat again!" Ava protested.

"I think you're past that. No offense." Amber patted ava on the shoulder. It was true, she wasn't a stick, but not as bad as she was at graduation. Still a bit of a pudge though...

Ava looked around the room for defense. No one gave in.

"Fine." she muttered. "I'm hungry, lets go."

* * *

It was late, I was tired as all hell, and I had class in the morning. Professer P. doesn't like it when anyone's late.  
So I stalked up the stairs to mine and Keiji's dorm room, half asleep.

My hand reached out for the door handle, and I pulled it open. I... really shouldn't have, because inside was Keijii, on the couch, getting maimed by a wild beast...Sexually maimed, I mean.

"OH MY GOD." I ghasped, and shut the door behind me, leaning up against it. Had he seen me? It was just... like anything I've ever seen, and I wanted to just barf.

Ugh, I could even still hear them, so I just booked it down the stairs, with a fresh fear in my mind.

...

I just saw Keiji getting it in the butt. Eughhh...


	2. Old Memories, and Lunch Meat

**Return of the Unspeakable Odds**

**Chapter 2: Old Memories, and Lunch Meat **

**Momo's POV:**

"I told you not to come home..." Keiji shrugged, taking a bite of the pancakes in front of him, drowned in too much syrup.

"Well, I had school in the morning, and I can't exactly commute from Malcolm's house."

"What about Amber, Ava, or..." He faded off.

"Or who?"

"Amber or Ava." I shrugged it off and sighed.

"Well, Amber went to Osaka for a sitcom audition, and... I don't like it at Ava's house." I pulled out my phone, answering a text from Ziggy. Keiji sighed and grabbed my phone.

"Momo, why do you still have this phone? You've had it since the end of high school." He said, a sense of annoyance dripping from his tongue like a broken faucet.

"Oh, uh... I don't know. I just heard a bunch of your information can get deleted if you upgrade."

"So? What does that matter? Are you talking about like, contacts?" I hesitated for a moment, my mind wandering for a few seconds.

"Uh, yeah."

"Well, Yeah, bt&t is the worst phone company ever. You can copy them down on paper and transfer them later."

"I just don't... drop it." I said kurtly. He shrugged.

"Alright, alright, I have to go meet Genghis for awhile." I shuddered at the thought and nodded.

"Kay, Sterling wanted me to come to his book club tonight, so I'll be home later."

"Book club? Really?"

"Well, Malcolm's getting dragged in too. Might as well."

"And Ava?" He asked, his tongue hanging out, due to his disgust.

"Nah, Puerto's getting her free tacos from the Taco Barn tonight." He said goodbye and left the room. I leaned back in the wearing down cedar wood chair. I looked at my phone, sliding it open, and back to normal. My finger made it's way to my contacts.

_Voice Mail_

I put it on speakerphone and listened in, possibly regretting it later.

_You have, one new message. New message; Sent, yesterday at 6:00 PM_

_'Hey Moo, It's Ava. I was wondering if you had any taco money, Puerto had to cancel tonight's taco night. IT'S ON TOMORROW BROSEPH! I WOULD invite you, but you are going to Sterling's. Doo-Doo face. Well, BEEE!' _

_Saved message; Sent, 2 years ago, July 20th, at 2 PM_

_'Uh, hi Momo..._

I felt sick.

_'I know what we were talking about on graduation night... and I just wanted to tell you, I signed the papers last week. I'm leaving to the airport now. Going to America...and... I was hoping you would be there with me... You know... to watch me sign those papers, supporting me... but... I completely understand what has been going on. And what you were saying about Ava's butterfly thing. I know you told me to forget about you... and I'm trying, but, I just needed to tell you that. And I wanted to thank you for being there for me... We've been through bumps, and I guess it just didn't work out. I... I won't ever forget you._

_I love you, Momo Takeda._

_Goodbye.'_

God dammit'. I wiped a stray tear which had made it's way to my chin, dripping onto the now cold pancakes.

_Saved Message; Sent, 3 years ago, January 16, at 8 AM_

_'Morning babe~! It's Darien! I just wanted to say, happy birthday Momo! I'll be seeing you in a little bit. Love you, bye!'_

I shut the phone off and stood up to wash my plate. Once the white plate was cleaned and in the cupboard, I gathered my things together. It's already lunch. Maybe I'll go... I don't know. I walked back into the living room and flopped onto the couch.

"GOD DAMMIT!" I shot up from the sudden voice and ran to the kitchen, grabbing a steak knife.

"Who's there?" It came from the office. I lifted my foot and slowly kicked the door open. There was an old fat woman, sitting at the computer, playing online slots.

"What do you want?" She asked, looking back at me. I narrowed my eyes.

"Excuse me, but could you GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE?! Keiji was supposed to throw you out yesterday!"

"He said I could stay one more day. I'm playing sluts."

"IT'S CALLED SLOTS! NOW GET OUT!" She hung her head and stood up, trudging out of the room. I sighed and set the knife on the table. That lady smelled like lunch meat.


	3. A Lot to Handle

**Return of the Unspeakable Odds**

**Chapter 3: A Lot to Handle  
**

**3 More Years Later:**

**Darien's POV:**

My eyes opened as I sat up on the bed, my forehead moist from the cold sweat. I felt sick, and like I had been asleep for awhile. I breathed in heavily and looked around me. This wasn't the barracks. In fact, I didn't know WHERE I was. My door creaked open, the loud noise causing me to cringe. I had a headache that throbbed like a metronome.

"Oh god... Baby!" The woman in the doorway cried, running to me and wrapping her arms around my neck. A sudden realization hit me. It was my mom.

"Uh, Mom? Why am I here? I thought I was in the field." She looked down and took my right hand.

"Honey... I don't know how to tell you this..." She grabbed my left elbow and held back tears, lifting it up. My eyes widened. "Darien, you lost your left hand in battle." My mouth gaped open as I looked at the small nub. "And you were shot in the side. You've been in a coma for a year, baby..."

* * *

**Momo's POV:**

"Mo~!" I turned around and smiled.

"Hey Keiji, back already?" I asked, leaning onto the now wearing down pink couch. Keiji and I had transferred our stuff into a new apartment about a year ago, after I'd finished college. Things had changed quite a bit.

Ava and Malcolm had decided to stay friends.

Amber had actually started to like Bruce and was starring in a big movie. It was exciting, except for the fact that her agent has the saying, 'You get Mandy, you get Andy.' Even though that show had ended last year, they were still a package deal. And not a willing one.

Keiji has become QUITE the man slut. I usually stay at Ava and Puerto's like, twice a week.

Ziggy was on a big trip to Taiwan to be on some reality show about hair stylists.

Marlin got over his nurse job and was now in the E.R.

And me?

I had my first real date since high school. I don't think we'll be going out again though... I guess I'm boring to him.

Oh yeah, and remember that lady that used to come into the apartment to play sluts- I mean, slots? She turned out to be Puerto's mother. She stopped coming since Puerto was sent to jail for stealing tacos for Ava. She had a week sentence for being an accomplice.

But one thing that hadn't changed... I still haven't gotten a new phone.

* * *

**Darien's POV:**

"A coma?" I asked, my eyebrows furrowing. She nodded, sitting herself next to my bed.

"They said you could have possibly gotten amnesia. What do you remember?" She asked. I shrugged, feeling shocked from a minute before.

"Well, I remember you, Dad, Jude, Brad, the rest of my family, Malcolm and his parents... And then... Ava... And... Something that starts with an A..."

"Amber?"

"Yeah!" I said, a small grin appearing. "And then there's Keiji..."

"Darien."

"What?"

"What about Momo?" My voice died down and I looked at my lap for a minute. It rang a bell. It was on the tip of my tongue.

"I know who Momo is. I just..."

"Well, honey, you don't have to think about that now. What else do you remember?"

"Well, Bruce, Ziggy, and Marlin, and I remember I always used to hang out at this high school. I was dating someone there. We dated for awhile, we broke up, but I tried to get her back. I also remember being in a play, going to a beach house, getting back together with her. Akemi. She killed herself when we came back... And Halloween... and then, a blank spot. I told the girl I was leaving for the military. She broke up with me, she graduated, and I left. Then, I left her a voicemail... and that's it. Well, besides stuff from before I was a softmore in college. Oh! And I took her back home! To meet my family!"

"You don't remember the girl?" I shook my head.

"I should... But I can't." I said. She patted my back.

"It's okay. Do you remember who she is?" Mom sighed and looked down.

"Yes. But if anybody is going to remember her, it will be you. Darien, I've been thinking."

"What?"

"Maybe you should move back to Japan for awhile to regain some memories. Visit friends. Malcolm, Keiji, Momo, Ava, Amber... Everybody else." I nodded.

"Okay. Who's Momo, though?"

"You'll know when you see her." I sighed. I had a feeling this was going to be a lot to handle.


	4. He's Not Ben

**Return of the Unspeakable Odds**

**Chapter 4: He's Not Ben.**

**Darien's POV:**

There it went. It was my plane that took me back here. My escape from America. Well, it wasn't exactly an escape, more like I was moving. I pulled my wallet out of my back pocket, unknowingly knocking my phone out of the same pocket. I opened it up and my mouth gaped open. One hundred? How am I gonna' afford my apartment? And a JOB! Where did I work before? Things are still a little blurry from before and I had no idea how long it would take for them to go back to normal.

"Uh, sir?" I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned around to see a teenage girl in front of me, holding my old phone in front of me.

"Oh, thank you." I replied. She looked at it for a moment.

"Your phone is so old... They stopped selling these like, two years ago. Now we have the Myphone!" She said, placing it in my hand. "I mean, I think you'd be able to get an upgrade... How long have you had this?" I smiled.

"Probably about five or six years." I sighed.

"Why haven't you upgraded?" I smiled small.

"I don't know... I guess I just haven't." She nodded.

"Aisha, let's go!" It was probably her parents. She waved goodbye and scurried off to her family. I looked at my phone for a minute. Maybe I could call someone on speed dial and whoever it is, I'll see if I can stay with them.

Let's start with 2.

_Ring...Ring...Ring...Ring..._

"Uh, hello?"

"Hi, this is Darien. Wait... is this Malcolm?" I heard a sharp intake of breath.

"AH! DARIEN!" He yelled. I heard a quiet, 'Who's that?' In the background.

"Hey. Who's with you?"

"Oh, it's just Marvin. Of course It's Darien. Shut up Dad." I nodded.

"Listen, can you pick me up at the airport? I need a bit of help."

"Sure. I'll be there in 30."

I need a job.

* * *

**One Week Later:**

**Momo's POV:**

"Is Puerto with you?"

"He's in the bathroom." Ava replied, putting a hand to her forehead.

"EVAH!" She sighed.

"WHAT PUERTO?!"

"CANDY SOAP!" Ava ran forward and snatched the soap away from his hand.

"NO! BAD PUERTO! NO HAY JABON CARAMELO!" He dropped the soap and walked away, his hairy head hanging as he walked.

"Okay..." And he was gone. Ava turned back to me and sat on the sofa.

"Listen, I don't think I was supposed to tell anyone... but..." I sat on the edge of the couch, hands on my knees."

"What?" The door smashed open and Keiji grabbed mine and Ava's hands.

"MOMO! YOU HAVE BEEN SINGLE FOR TOO LONG! I AM TAKING YOU OUT. AVA, SINCE YOU AREN'T FAT, YOU CAN COME TOO. PUERTO CAN HAVE A PLAY-DATE WITH THE LADY WHO PLAYS SLUTS IN OUR HOUSE! WE ARE GOING NOW!"

"KEIJI! It's called sluts- AH! Slots!"

"Whatever! We are going to a male strip club!" I sighed.

"Are you kidding?!"

"NO! I'm horny and you two are lonely!" Ava looked at me.

"You wanna'?" I bit my lip.

"I don't know."

"THEN LET'S GO!"

* * *

"Keiji, I don't know about this..."

"Come on Mo! Ding-Dongs is one of the HOTTEST male strip clubs in Japan!" I stared up, a sillouhette of a man in a fedora sitting on a chair, apparently seductive. He opened the doors and we showed the men our ID's.

"Don't touch the strippers." He said as we entered. It reeked of smoke and alcohal, but had some sort of a fun atmosphere. Keiji ran off to go and get a dance or something while Ava and I went to sit at the bar.

"Well hello ladies. What can I get you?" An attractive man resembling Magic Mike asked, leaning on the counter.

"Uh, do you guys have YooHoo?" Ava asked, sounding totally serious. "Or Danimals."

"Um, how about a Cozmo?" She shrugged.

"That works too I guess." He looked at me.

"You know... I think a beer sounds good." He served up our drinks, and unsurprisingly, we drank. Ava decided she had to do something, while I chatted with the bartender.

"You've been single for five years?" He asked, laughing. "You crazy or something?" I grinned and looked down.

"No... I've had a couple dates, but I haven't been that interested since high school. How long have you been single?" Ben, his name, shrugged.

"Like, a month or two." I nodded.

"I see." By now, I was pretty loose. Drunk. I don't know the word. The intercom sounded and I looked around the room.

"Hello lovely ladies!"

"HEY!" A lot of us sounded. Even Keiji...

"Well, we're having a contest here for a private show from our best man of the night, BIG D!" I smiled. "All you ladies, whoever catches the banana in their mouth from our bartender, Ben, wins!" I nodded and stood up a little wobbly.

"Alright Misser Ben, let me win!"

"We'll see about that." He chuckled. I stood back with the rest of the chicks and opened my mouth. I felt the world went black for a minute. Once my eyes had opened, the whole club was clapping and I was being led into the back room, banana in my mouth. I spit it out and sat on the chair. I smiled and looked up as a man exited from the curtains. He was smiling, but his eyes had bags underneath them.

"Well hi there!" I smiled up at him.

"Hello to you too." He responded. He had bright blue eyes and his hair had been styled to look like a fohawk but it had a police hat over it, and he was wearing chaps. He looked somewhat familiar. The door burst open and Ava popped her head in.

"MALCOLM'S A MALE STRIPPER!" And she ran away. I shook my head and looked back to 'Big D.'

"So, what's your real name?" I asked. He smirked.

"Just call me..." And my world went totally black.

* * *

**The Next Morning:**

I sat up from my bed and stretched. I looked at the time next to me to find that it was almost two. I sighed and scratched my head. There was someone next to me. I lay back down and realized, I wasn't exactly wearing clothes. Who did I sleep with last night? Was it Ben? I looked at my hand to see his number and first name scrawled across it. It must be him. I wonder what happened with that Big D guy... He looked so familiar. I put a hand on his exposed shoulder as he slept and leaned over to get a good look at him. I saw blue eyes struggle to open and up sat a man. It wasn't Ben. He scratched his head.

"Mm... Morning. I have a feeling I'll get fired today. Not sure if I should sleep with my customers." He laughed. I giggled as I leaned against him. He began to turn my way, and I felt my stomach hitch. "Well, I hope you liked wha-" His eyes widened and so did mine.

"Ah-"

"Uh-"

"D-Darien?" I asked, pulling the sheet over myself. We sat up quickly.

"Momo?" And then, almost like on queue, we both screamed.


	5. Stuck in a Chimney

**Return of the Unspeakable Odds**

**Chapter 5: Stuck in a Chimney**

**Momo's POV:**

No way.

"What is..." Darien started, sitting on the opposite side of the bed, putting his hat on his head.

"I..." I replied, brushing my hair back. "Darien, what are you doing back here?"

"I, I came back to Japan. I was in a coma for awhile." My eyes diverted to the fake looking hand.

"Uh, what's with your hand?" He looked down at it and then to the right.

"Oh... It was... It was blown off in the battle." I felt frozen.

"How are you now?"

"I'm fine." He replied. "No need to treat me any different just because of my arm." I nodded as it became deathly quiet, still air filling the room.

It was a better time than any to talk to him.

"Uh, Darien... I think we should talk." I said, scratching my head. He looked confused for a second.

"About what?"

"We need to talk about us." He narrowed his eyes.

"Us? What about us?" I sighed.

"You know... Sort our relationship out. Figure out some things. Fix it?" He stood up.

"Momo, what do you mean 'relationship'?"

"Like, us... Boyfriend and girlfriend?" He pulled his shoes on as a look of sympathy overcame his face.

"Momo, we don't have a relationship. You broke up with me."

"But what about that voice mail?"

"I know... But I just can't be with you. Last night was..." He slid his jacket over his shoulders. "No... We were both drunk. And, by the way... It didn't feel really good having to go to sign those papers for the military after JUST getting dumped. I don't think I want a relationship right now." My face fell solemn.

"Wait! But Darien, I-"

"Momo. I can't." He looked around awkwardly. Or, Awk-ed, as Ava called it. "I should leave. I'll probably see you around later." I nodded slowly as he exited, the door slamming a little bit behind him. It was like a time bomb was ready to go off in me. I wasn't able to hold a hard cover much longer. Just wait, you guys. If I don't do something soon, I'm bound to blow up.

* * *

**Ava's POV:**

"Malcolm, just come ON!" I said as he handed me a drink.

"I've started to get used to these chaps..."

"Take the chaps with you! I can't do the show alone! We have to record a show. TONIGHT!"

"No! I'm actually liking this."

"Malcolm. I had a feeling you'd react like this... So, I have a back up plan." He narrowed his eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"Malcolm, what's the golden rule here?"

"Keep your dicks in your pants?"

"The other one."

"No matter who it is, you have to serve them what they desire."

"GET IN HERE!" I screamed. Malcolm flinched and when he looked over to the door, he dropped the tray.

"Hey Malcolm..." And there he was. Ginger afro, crooked teeth, and all.

"T...TYLER?!" Yes. To all of you who don't know Tyler, He was friends with Darien and dated Akemi for awhile. But, he also had tried to rape Malcolm SEVERAL times, Amber saving him a couple of those times. He was a creep who had been bailed out of jail a year ago for sexual harassment. Tyler strutted towards him and threw a fifty in his hand.

"Private dance. Now."

"AVA LET'S GO!"

"That's what I thought."

* * *

"Well guys, here we are, standing on the rooftop of the Craven household! Strange noises started surfacing as we ate a sandwich in the dining room, attempting to tempt the apparition. So now, Malcolm will go down the chimney to attract it."

"This makes no sense!" He said pushing himself into the tight hole of the chimney.

"We'll be right back, AFTER THIS!" The camera turned off and I looked at Malcolm.

"Alright, let's go eat food." Malcolm nodded and began to (attempt) shimmy himself out of the chimney.

"GAHHH!" He almost slipped, but caught himself so his two scrawny arms were holding himself up, and away from falling.

"Malcolm. Please tell me you're not stuck."

"I'm not stuck." I began to walk away.

"Kay, meet you at McBurgers."

"NO WAIT I LIED I AM STUCK HELP!" I turned on my heel and sat in front of the chimney.

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah. If I move, I'll fall, and I can't get my ass out the top way, so I'm stuck!"

"Sucks you were born with a big as right?"

"DON'T TALK ABOUT IT! Now... since I'm stuck, there's something I want to ask you."

"What?" I asked, suspicious.

"Well," He began, "There was this movie I watched when I was younger about these four girls who wer singers and dancers, but they started fighting a lot. And when they were too busy fighting, one of the girls' dog got stuck in some kind of chimney vent thing. They were crying but they sang and danced to a song to give the dog hope of getting out..." My mouth gaped with disapointment.

"Malcolm, is this from one of those cheetah girls movies?"

"Ehem... no...yes..."

"So, what the poop do I need to do?"

"Well... Are Amber and Momo busy?"

* * *

**Well, Momo and Darien are done, but who knows, things may change! And Malcolm is stuck in a chimney, wanting something oddly strange to give him hope of living. Will Ava get Amber and Momo so they can fill this order, or will she dump him for McBurgers?**

**An odd chapter, I know, but review!**


	6. I Will Eat Your Family

**Return of the Unspeakable Odds**

**Chapter 6: I will eat your family**

**Ava's POV:**

A pleasent view of Malcoms ass sat even more pleasently hovering in my vision. Not bare, or anything. Just clothed, and hilarious in a bro-esque way.

But anyways, I answered his question with the hollow truth. "Yeah. They're busy."

"Oh. Shit." He grumbled in nervous breath.

"It's cool." I sighed. "Just so happens that Keiji has an orgasmic singing voice, and I'm sure he'd be more than happy to help out. I'll just call him up."

"You do that." His voice lacks the seriousness that mine is nearly composed of.

"Wait, you were serious?" Malcom asked through his stone prison.

"I dunno', are YOU serious?" I'd asked. "You're the one who thinks that you'll get yourself out of a chimney if a couple of women sing crappy tunes to you, so shut your butt."

"It was never open." He whined. "Now just call him already."

So I did it. I flipped out that phone, and dialed that number that rang in my mind like a bell.

Soon enough, he picked up, probably thinking it was amber.

"Hey." He greeted.

"Sup."

My voice was recognized, and I'm surprised he didn't hang up. "Oh my god, I swear this better be good."

And it was. It really really was. "Malcom got his phat ass stuck in chimney, and he want's you to serenade him out."

"Everyone." Malcom hissed under his breath. "Makes. Me. Sound. GAY."

Ignoring is a part of my game, and I played it well. "You wanna' come down and help out?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Really?" I asked, pretty surprised that Keijii would wanna' do anything to help out me, let alone MY show.

"Honestly..." His voice had a drop of sexual Keiji tension in it. "I'm only doing this for that hilltop-five star-beverly- view of Malcom's ass. I mean, seriously. Have you seen that thing?"

"Yeah." My voice lacked the exitment that Keiji may have been looking to relate to. "I'm looking at it right now, and it's waiting for you to save it, so hurry up."

"Alright." He agreed bleakly. "D'you mind if I bring Gh- Actually, wait. Nobody care's what you think. I'm bringing Ghenghis along. We've got a date."

"Good for you." Though I honestly didn't give a rats heind quarters, I gave him his biscuit. "So come down okay? I'll save Malcom's ass for you."

And so I did.

MOMO'S POV:

"HOE, HOE, HOE, HOE, HOE."

The chants were like rain, and they wetted me with their weight. It wasn't christmas, but ho-ho-ho was flying around with large enough wings to phase me.

So, stop. Rewind. Why am I here? Why were there twelve or twenty angry men in pink bannana hammocks chanting hurtful things about me?

So rewind farther. I was foolish, and who could really blame me? I was young, and the heat was high, and all that really mattered was my love-life. And if fixing my love life meant flirting with several of Darien's coleagues in order to heat up some jelousy in him, so it was.

But it was all together, a moldy stinky failure. Excuse my childish french, but it was. Darien was a bro, and his bro's were bro's, which meant there backs surrounded eachother, and none were to be left behind. So they told, and they gathered around me chanting things like I was a slutty campfire.

"LOOK'S LIKE I'M SANTA, CAUSE WE'VE GOT A HOE-HOE-HOE!" The one with the slick black hair that dripped down his head like dirty oil chanted at me. I looked in his eyes, and they scolded me. They hated me, but it didn't matter, because they weren't Darien's. But his were there.

His eyes were blue, and that may be to plain to some, but man were they blue. Even when he stood across the room in blind hatred, or pitty, or a mix of the two, they were the ocean, and I wanted to be the boat that rocked in those seas and swayed with the mist that sang me to sleep.

It was ofcourse, my fault. I'd been cold and rejected him in the past. It could have been us, but now it was me, and it was him, and it was the rest of the world that chanted things at me, and only me. Alone, I was the campfire in the middle, and I was slowly burning burning burning out.

But as I left something told me to look back, and whether I should have or not remanins another question that I choose not to trip over. So I did. As I left in an ashamed stooper, I looked back to see those eyes in sorrow. But they bid me goodbye, and they turned around while the sorrow snapped shut. Because did I ever even diserve any in the first place?

Malcom's pov:

"TOGETHER WE CAN!"

It was true. Keiji's singing voice was a river of all the right notes that skipped and swimmed over the rocks that threatened to shread anyone else.

His eyes seemed to move with the words that left his mouth majestically.

Soon enough though, they stopped, and I was still stuck like that last bit of toothepaste that everyone abandons.

We all waded awkwardly in a grimy silence that left a bad taste in everyone's mouths.

"Well..." I said. "We're screwed."

"Screw my NUTS." Said Ghenghis, the one with the red matted dreads that came from his head like rope, and the burnt orange skin. He stalked over angrilly. "I'll handle this, or my name isn't the red bandit."

The red bandit. Now that rang a few bells, but I hadn't the time to remember, because this guy began to yank me with the strength of a drunken ox. And out I fell, flat to the cold wood floor.

"I ship it." Keijji chuckled. "Your face and the floor, I mean."

"Good." Ava sighed with some sort of relief. "Our ratings were about to plummet... like your phat ass to the floor. Ha."

No one laughed. No one laughs at Ava's jokes. We all looked at her coldly, and turned back to our own releif.

"Lets go." Keiji ushered ghenghis away, and they stomped off as their accesories jingled them a leaving tune. But just before I heard the door close, I'd heard something else. And I felt something too.

Something warm and stale krept up behind my ear, and fogged with my ear drums.

"_I will eat your family_." His voice was hush but threatening. This guy... Ghenghis... Who had barely said TWO words to me in his whole life... had just threatened to eat my family.

He gave me the stink eye as he floated out of the room with bitter grace. I looked up at Ava from an unflattering angle, and pleaded that she'd heard it too.

"What's the prob, bob?" She asked. "You look pale... And malcomy."

"GHENGHIS... HE- he- Just threatened to eat my family!" I complained.

"Oh malcom." She patted my head uncomfortably with her hand. I didn't like it. "Shut your trap. We have a show to do."

But those words didn't leave me. They stayed like a fart in the room.

'I will eat your family...'

_/

The world was quiet, and so was the car ride back. I'd almost taken the ride with Ava, just because I didn't wanna' be alone. I really though didn't feel like sitting through a lecture of her OTP'S and her fake OTP'S, and why my parents reminded her of The Gorillaz. It's The Gorillaz, right?

But the van seemed safe enough. Okay, no it didn't, that it a _complete _lie. There was this sour feeling in the air. That feeling that you're not alone. I let it go though, and I drove home without any other interuptions.

When I'd arrived, the windows were lit up brighter than the morning sky, and every one of them too. Paying the slow attention of a tired boy, I entered the house that I'd still lived in. The one that still kept my parents too.

Sterling was still awake on his shoshiba, tapping away with blogging or something.

"Hey." I came to the counter where he was and began to drumb my fingers.

"Hey hon." He said, not giving his attention away from the computer.

And that was all. That was all the conversing we'd got, before that red roped haired man broke through the cabinet and cracked our imagination of possibility right open. I shreiked, and fell backward with every inch of fear that I'd ever feel, while he went with these crazy unhuman eyes, directly teethe to arm to my dad.

I watched in agony as I was completley sure that the zombie appocalypse had struck us all in the ass, and that me and sterling were the second and third to go.

But deflect. Ghenghis was deflected by the shot of sterlings seemingly weak fist into his genghis's nose.

"DOWN MOTHER FUCKER, DOWN!" Sterling's voice was completley altered from that sweet young motherly type, to wesley snipes, or something like him. Ghenghis fell to the floor, and a sweet pile of red stained the floor from his nose.

I just looked at sterling, and I looked at ghenghis as I poked at just what the fuck was going on.

He brushed it all away, completley unshocked.

"Well." Sterling sighed. "We can't always have nice things, can we?"


	7. Only Sometimes

**Return of the Poops**

**Chapter 7: Only Sometimes**

**Momo's POV:**

Well, there I sat, my ass on that musky smelling couch, feeling utterly humiliated about what had happened the night before. It was two in the afternoon, and I sat, watching the asian Grey's Anatomy while wearing polka dotted pajama pants with a black male t-shirt. The t-shirt supplied by Keiji. I doubted he'd notice though, considering he bought shirts from the same section and size rack. Not the point though. I was thinking about how I got embarressed at a strip club the night before. I'll talk about that later...

'HOE! HOE! HOE!'

The entire strip club yelled at me. And what really tore me down was that mixed up glance from Darien before he turned away to go talk to his friends and give some fat brunette a lap dance. Those blue eyes had multiple feelings all jumbled into those two orbs of that wonderful guy whom I'd had to let down the one time he needed me. He had helped me through everything. Whether it was Akemi's death, filling in for that school play, and a lot of other things. And I couldn't even give him any consent or blessing. I never even went with him to sign those papers. Before he left, everyone in the troops were being said goodbye to by their pretty girlfriends, wives, even kids...

Those eyes were filled with hatred. Hatred, pity, disapointment, happy that I was getting what I deserved. I was a hoe.

A hoe who was going to spend fucking CHRISTMAS alone this year. Keiji will be with his new boyfriend, Samwell, Ava and Malcolm have to record their show, Same with Amber, and if I spent Christmas with anyone, it would be at Puerto's grandmother's house in Chihuahua, eating Quesadillas and churros.

Okay, that was a little racist. But I'm not in the mood to put myself down more than I already am. I've hit Rock Bottom. Once the bus leaves, you have to wait awhile before you go back up. That was a Spongebob reference by the way.

I could have said that now that I've hit Rock Bottom, things can only go up.. and that's true, but what about the part about how Spongebob had to wait for the whole night in a ghetto place, inflating his Gloverworld hat and flying out of there.

I never understood Spongebob. I remember that one time in high school when we went to that beach house and I walked in on a sleeping Zero whom was watching that exact episode of Spongebob.

"MOMO! I'M BACK!" I looked over to the door to see Amber. My eyes widened as big as melons. Weird analogy.

"Amber?! I thought you were in like... Osaka or something!"

"I'm only a plot device, due to the fact that the author says you bitch too much about Darien."

"Hey! I bitch only because I have things to bitch about! Wait... what author?" Amber put her hands on her hips.

"You know, I don't even know. Well, I'm gonna' go visit Brucie. Haven't seen him in like... a month." She said. I nodded.

"Really? How are you two doing, by the way?"

"Eh, pretty good. Well, bye!" And she closed the door behind her. I shrugged and sat back once again. Standing up, I threw an empty pint of chocolate mocha ice cream into the trash bin. Yeah, it's cliche... but can you say I tecnically went through a break up?

No, that's stupid. We drunk-fucked, and had some closure. It's done! It's done and I can now go and find someone new! Before, we never had any closure like this, so I guess I wasn't able to move on. But here I am!

...

Sitting on a couch, recovering from an embarressing night.

Right. I forgot to tell you what happened, didn't I?

Well, there isn't much to tell. I went to the strip club again, flirted with one of the bartenders, (I think it was Ben) and soon enough, Darien was giving me that look, and everbody in the club started calling me a hoe until I ran out. Nobody did anything to help. But I guess I was being a hoe. And I guess I WAS being that crazy ex girlfriend type... And I guess I WAS trying to make him jealous.

But that was the end of that.

Until now.

**_Knock Knock Knock_**

Was that Amber again? I stood up and straightened out my hair with my fingers before looking through the peephole.

What was HE doing here? I opened the door and furrowed my eyebrows.

"Darien?" He took in a breath.

"Momo, what the hell?" I crossed my arms.

"What the hell, what?" I asked. He looks angry.

"Were you pulling the 'Creepy Ex-Girlfriend' and trying to get into Ben's pants just to make me jealous?!"

"I was not! We were having a nice conversation..."

"You asked him if he wanted to go home with you."

"You need to calm your balls. Stop thinking that I'm doing anything because of you. We're done." He put a hand on the wall next to me and leaned forward.

"I'm not 'thinking' you're doing anything because of me. Even though I know you were just angry because I rejected YOU this time."

me ever so nicley. "Ring a bell? No. Ofcourse you wouldn't kow, because you're always riding it aren't you?"

"I'm not riding shit!" I defend, but my lame

"You did not 'reject' me! It was mutual."

"No, you asked me if we were back together, and I said no. Just stop acting like this. I still care about you, I just don't want to go through all this again."

"Go through what?"

And he flashes me that look. That "dude you're so retarted" Type look. God do I hate that look.

"Your bitch-mode rollercoaster, Momo?" He reminds. "But you wouldn't know, would you? Since' you're always riding it."

"i'm not riding shit!"

"Please, you think you're Marlin. You're not Marlin, so just... uh... SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH."

And my mouth drops. He catches sight and knows what an asshole he is.

"YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH!" I argue.

"Okay... that was a little out of line, I admit... but... Why am I here again?"

"You're selling girl scout cookies."

"Oh. For reals?"

"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE."

"I'M NOT IN YOUR HOUSE, I'M ON YOUR DOORSTEP. ARGUMENT INVALID."

I pick up the arguing. "YOU'RE INVALID."

"YOU'RE A SLUT."

And slam. He's gone with the heavy shut of a door to his stupid face. Stupid darien and his stupid antics. Antics and his stupid darien. Wait, what? Damnit, I need a drink. Or twelve.

* * *

**Darien's Pov:**

So drunk might be I. Or.. wait, I might be drunk. Was that what I meant to say? Yeah. I think it was.

BUT WHO CARES? You hold me like you should, so I'm gonna' keep on dancin'! Or... actually, I sang that part. Did I mention I'm still at work after hours? Did I menton I'm the only guy in the audience?

"Yes darien, you mentioned that." Malom beckons from behind me. That cute little scrawny stick of love muffin, I just wanna lick him. Not in a gay way though, just like in a brotherly awesome way.

"Darien." A red in the face little buddy malcom taps my shoulder. "I can hear everything you're saying."

"YOU CAN READ MINDS?" My mouth gapes open at his amazing awesomeness. "THAT'S FUCKIN' BRO SHIT, RIGHT THERE."

"Darien, you're saying everything outloud." Malcom says. "Just a minute ago, you said I was a scrawny little stick of love muffin, and that you wanted to lick me. You're nerorating everything, and frankly, it scares me."

"I love you, man." I laugh. "I really really do."

"Come on, I'm taking you home." And on his little malcom words, he grabs me by my hands and we're just like... swirled out of there, dude! Well, he actually just takes me out, but I feel like it's swirled.

And once we get out... everything is just so bright and pretty and fuzzy... With all these purty pink lights and shit.

"This reminds me of a thingy." I gush. "Like a thingy I read somewhere about gay people."

"If this is about my parents-"

"It's not!" I shout at his malcomy-malcom face. "Hey, do you still chase butterflies ever?"

"Shut up, I hate you."

"What?"

"Nothing." He sighs. "Lets just get in the car, alright? Please?"

So hey, we do! Because I'm a nice guy, right? I buckle myself right in, and soon enough I notice that there are other butthole faces here too.

"Oh, hey!" I laugh. "You guys! You buttholes! Whazzapp?"

This crew of buttholey faces consists of fat marlin, and fatter bruce who looks like a fat face, because he is one. No litterally, he's just sitting there with this fat ass look on his face, I'm just like "ewwww..."

"Did you just call me fat?" Bruce raises a fat eyebrow. "Fuck you, darien. Just because you lost Momo doesn't mean you can call everyone else out on their shit."

"Momo..." I mutter. "Wow, she's hot. And not just hot though, I mean she's like... so pretty. So... just really great, you know? Like so great, that if I only had one peice of bacon, I'd give it to here."

"And you call bruce fat." Marlin shakes his face around.

"He is." I hop back on subject. "But Momo... I mean... what a woman. The way she moves, and makes that cute little sneeze... That little daiee-choo! I just... I miss her so much, I really do... She's so great... She's so great, and I love her..."

"Yeah yeah yeah, and you blew it, and you called me fat, so shut up darien." Bruce deadpans.

"I really did..." I sigh. "I mean... god, I'm such a dick, I bet she cried, man. I called her a whore, AND A SLUT. I'M A TERRIBLE HUMANOID."

"Okay, quiet down tobor 2.4." Marlon says. "You sounded like a robot there for a sec. And could you stop nerorating everything? We can hear you, you know."

"Okay." I close my eyes. "Ima go to sleep now. That okay? I hope so..."

The sound dies off, and so do I, in a way... Except one voice stays.

"I hate him and I hope he dies... Only sometimes." Malcom murmurs. "Only sometimes."

* * *

**Momo's pov:**

So wasted might be the momo. Or... Momo might be wasted. Is that what I meant to say? I think it is... But hey, I don't care! I just dance, baby!

"LIVING IN BEVERLY HILLS!" I shout. "THAT'S... WHAT A COOL THING IS."

And hey, this club is pretty bumpin'! Everyone's pretty quiet, and it kind of smells like corn farts in here, but I still dance, boy! THIS CLUB IS MY KINDA' THING!"

"Momo." An Ava-ish voice peeks out from behind me. "This is the old country buffet."

Wait, old country- huh? So that's why it smells like corn farts in here. I was growing pretty sucpicious.

"Come on moo-face." Boring old face ava says. "We're going."

So we keep a-walkin and doing cool walking stuff, until it's not warm and corn smelling anymore. We're outside.

"Hey ervah." I giggle. "Do you still like Can-a-may?"

"Shut up I hate you and hope you die."

"What?"

"Nothing." Ava says. "Lets just get to the car, okay?"

"What car?" I ask.

"Malcoms van. He was picking me and amber and Keiji up to drop us off at the craven residence for extra-exploration, but than the people from old country buffer called and said you were terorizing fat people, so we had to cancel. What were you doing at old country buffet in the first place?"

"Terrorizing fat people." I hiccup. "It was fun, I did it with a spoon."

But she whatevers me, and we take our residence in Malcoms van. Thank god it's big, because... shit, there's alot of people in here. You've got malcom, Amber, Bruce, and Keijii, and marlon, and... Oh fuck.

"All of the sudden." Darien, who I've just noticed is here, says. "Momo's prettyish face got in the car, and I'm like whaat!"

"Why's he nerorating shit?" I ask, as amber takes light charge and pushes me down in a seat next to him. Piff, as if I wanna' see this dump for brains, now I'm sitting next to him.

"This car is so like... full." I tell all these peeps. "Like SO full."

Darien face turns to me. He smells like poop and southern comfort. "If I had a bacon and I was fat like Bruce, I'd still give it to you., I said."

To inspect this, I turn and look. Sure enough, bruce is a FAT FUCK. His face is just like, squishing around and I'm like.. uhmm hello? Diabetes,much?

"Ha!" I giggle. "He looks like a fat mashed potato."

"I KNOW, RIGHT?" Darien agrees in his shout. "HE'S JUST SO FAT, OH MY GOD!"

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Bruce's voice cracks as he shouts.

"Are you crying?" Malcom turns his head from the front and asks.

"No, shut up." Bruce sniffs.

"He is fat." Amber agrees. "I mean sorry bruce, but you kind of look like you obsorbed half of the people in old country buffet."

Yup, I'm pretty sure he's crying now.

But I look at darien, and he looks at me, and Im pretty sure our faces would just like melt together if that was possible. I almost want them too.

"I'm gonna go to sleep now, okay guys?" I yawn. "Is that okay? I hope it is..."

"I hate her and I hope she dies." Ava says from the front. "Only sometimes."

"Only somtimes." Malcom repeats.

"Only sometimes." Darien and I say in unison. "Only sometimes..."

And than the world dies, and we go to sleep. Well... maybe I hope it would. But only sometimes... Only sometimes.


	8. Cragness, Fatooley, and Brucava

**Return Of The Unspeakable Odds:**

**Chapter 8: Cragness, Fatooley, and Brucava**

**Momo's POV:**

Cold.

I sat up and blinked my watery eyes, laying back onto the ground, looking up at the gloomy sky...

Wait... sky? Now I actually stood up quickly, the force sending throbs to my head. I place a hand to it and suddenly realize where I am. I fell asleep in the parking lot of The Old Country Buffet last night. And blurs of the night come crashing back to me. I remember seeing Brucie and making him cry. Ava told me she hates me or something. Throwing spoons at fat people... And I feel like I saw Darien there. Oh yeah! I remember!

"If I had a bacon and I was fat like Bruce, I'd still give it to you, I said."

Was that supposed to be a compliment? Whatever. That was all I'd remembered. I suddenley felt all that I'd drank come back up my system. I looked for the nearest bowl type thing. Once found, I emptied my stomach into it. Dropping the hat, I sighed and wiped my mouth.

"Oh my god..." I felt like a dump. I heard a whimper next to me and turned slowly to find a hatless Malcolm. "Oh, hey Malcolm. Where's your hat?"

"I hate you go fuck yourself I hope you die." He said, the sentence running on and his voice beginning to break. His mouth was pouted. I looked to the ground.

"Uh, oh... That was your... I'm sorry."

"Yeah. Okay, but I'm not crying." I nodded and stepped back.

"So, Malcolm, what happened last night?" He sighed.

"You threw spoons at fat people, made Brucie cry, you and Darien passed out in the back seat, you jumped out of the car and went back to the Country Buffet and they kicked you out, so you fell asleep on the sidewalk. You took my hat and ran off, so, here we are now."

"Oh. Sorry about your hat."

"Whatever. But do you need a ride home?"

"Sure. Actually, I'm hungry. Let's go to Ihop." Malcolm sighed.

"Uggggggg. Fine. I'll call the others."

At Ihop:

The table was kind of awkward. I leaned over to Malcolm.

"Why'd you invite Darien?" Malcolm sighed.

"Because fuck you, that's why." I narrowed my eyes.

"Malcolm, can pass maple syrup?" Asked a hungry Puerto. Malcolm glared.

"Shut the fuck up, Puerto." Keiji stood up.

"Malcolm! Stop being mean to illegal immigrants! Now YOU shut the fuck up and get the fuck out. I want you to sit in the parking lot and think about what you've done, you good for nothing son of a bitch before I take your balls and shove them so far up your ass, that they come out each of your nostrils."

Silence.

A small sob fell from Malcolm's mouth. I looked around awkwardly. Malcolm stood up.

"Okay..." And he walked out the door. My mouth gaped open and I looked at Keiji.

"Keiji, what was that?" Darien shot up, half asleep due to his hangover.

"Heyy! Stop being mean to... uh... Malcolm!" He sat back down and rested his head on the table.

"Yeah. Keiji, what was that for?" Amber asked, drinking a sip of apple juice. He sat back in his chair.

"I think I'm on my Mariod." I raised and eyebrow.

"What's a 'Mariod.' " I asked, utterly confused.

"Well, it's like a 'male' 'period' without the blood. I just get moody around this time." Ava shook her head.

"How can you be in a bad mood in December? It's almost Christmas!" Bruce nodded.

"That's true. And plus, you just got your hand in my pancakes, Ava." She removed her now maple syrup coated hand.

"Oh, sorry." She lifted herself from her seat to go to the bathroom, but I noticed her licking her hand.

"I've been thinking. For the past few years, we've done Secret Santa, and now that Darien's back-"

"Huh?" Darien looked up. Amber sighed.

"As I was saying, now that Darien's back, we should do it again this year to welcome him back to Japan." Everyone mumbled their agreements, and it was decided. We were gonna' go back to mine and Keiji's place to figue out who gets who after breakfast.

Malcolm entered the overcrowed pancake house and sat down with us.

"Malcolm, do you have something to say to Puerto? Oh, and Momo."

He gave a child's sigh, and crossed his arms, in a huff.

"...Fine." Keiji egged him on. "Sorry Puerto." Puerto nodded.

"I still no like skinny boy."

Malcolm sighed. "Okay..."

Amber looked at Malcolm. "Shouldn't you say serreh to Momo?" Everyone looked over to Amber. "What?" She asked.

Bruce chuckled. "Did you just say 'Serreh'?"

"Yeah. Malcolm needs to apologize to Momo. You know, say serreh." Darien even woke up to this.

"Amber, it's pronounced 'sorry'." Amber glared at Darien.

"How about you shut up, go get drunk again, and gesture gay things to Malcolm." Darien looked at Malcolm.

"You told her?"

"Yeah." He put a hand to his forehead.

"Malcolm, you suck."

The waitress came by to give us our check, but stopped and looked at Darien.

"Darien?" He looked over. Ava and Amber looked to the girl, then back to me. Why did she look like me? Blonde hair, green eyes? What?!

"Oh, uh, do I know you?" She giggled a stupid school girl giggle that just pisses me off. She's a bitch. I can feel it.

That's over the line. Don't be mad Momo.

"Darien, you silly! It's me! Stella? Remember?" Malcolm stood up in fright, anger, and shock.

"WHY IS YOUR NAME FATOOLEY! THAT IS PLAIN WEIRD!" We all looked at him.

"Um... I said Stella." Malcolm looked around, and then at his hands. He flipped over his hands and licked it. He sat down.

"Malcolm? What is... Are you okay?" Malcolm looked over to me and cocked his head.

"I... what?" He grabbed a lock of my hair and looked at it for a second before tugging at it. I was dragged along with the hair.

"Ow ow ow ow! Malcolm! Stop!" He let go and stood up.

"Some guy just gave me hash, so I'm gonna' go to the meuseum." And he left. I put a hand to my head.

"That hurt." Darien shoved a hand to my mouth to shut me up. He propped himself up on an elbow and looked back to Stella.

Actually, I should just call her Fatooley.

I smacked Darien's hand away and glared, crossing my arms.

"We met last night!" She laughed, hitting his shoulder. He nodded.

"Oh yeah! How could I forget a pretty face like you?" She laughed and looked at the table.

"I was at this bar with my friend, and this guy comes over and leans on my table. He says, 'I swear I could have noticed a bit of staring.' before winking, and then falling over my chair. It was hilarious." Everyone else laughs.

'Well I think I noticed a bit of staring...'

That same line. He used that same line on me when he first met me. I sighed on the inside and cleared my throat.

"Can I have my check please?" Stella nodded and smiled.

"Here you go." I looked at it and placed a twenty. I took one more glance at Darien and Stella before standing up.

"I'm gonna' go call Sterling for Malcolm." Amber nodded. Darien shot me one glance. It was like that, 'I don't care, go away' look. I didn't like that look...

I leave the table and walk outside, only to lean against the outside wall. I wiped the emotion from my face as a man walked up to me.

"Hi. I'm Cragness." I raised an eyebrow.

"Um, hi."

"Wanna' buy some hash?" I shook my head slowly.

"Um... no thank you." He shrugged his little shoulders and walked away. I rummaged through my pockets and grabbed my phone, calling Malcolm's home phone.

"Hello, Pawtnicks residence, Sterling speaking."

"Hi, this is Momo." Sterling squealed.

"Oh my goodness! Hi Momo! Where's my baby boy?"

"Um, some guy named Cragness sold him some hash, so now he's at the meuseum." He sighed on the other line.

"Dammit... I'll be there. Bye."

"Bye Sterling." and I hung up. I looked in my pocket for my keys until realizing that I drove with Malcolm.

I have my keys, but my car isn't here. I take to the pavement, treading with a slow speed through the streets. I put the tangled earphones into my phone and listen to the first thing to come on. Something by Maroon 5. I only downloaded so I wouldn't look stupid when I met him. You know, like those people that are all like, 'Oh, I love this band! But I don't know any of their songs!'

I bet that bitch Fatooley is one of those people.

Beside the point. Cars drive by, and I realize they belong to my friends. Not noticing me of course. And now I have to walk home alone. Only a mile to go.

I unlocked and opened the door to the apartment and threw my stuff inside. Everyone was already there.

"Hey, where'd you go? I thought you were gonna' come back after you call Sterling." Bruce stated, opening a beer.

"Oh, I just decided to come back here."

Just before Amber was about to say something, the door slammed open. It was Ava.

"THAT MAPLE SYRUP I GOT ON MY HAND WILL NOT COME OFF!" She stomped over to Bruce, hand covered in gross muck. She slapped his face. "TAKE IT BACK!" He grabbed her hand to move it, but there was a problem.

It wouldn't come off.

"Ava, get your hand off my face."

"I can't." Amber looked at them.

"You're like, a mutant! Brucava."

Darien's Pov:

"Okay errbody, pick a paper out of the hat!" Keiji yelled after grabbing his own paper. He went to Ava, Amber, Bruce, Momo, Malcolm, Marlon (Who'd just arrived), and me. I opened my paper, feeling a bit anxious. My eyes widened.

Oh shit.

**What's up with all you?! I'm surprised I was able to crack out a chapter so fast! Review, Rate, and Follow!**


	9. Inner Voice

**Return Of The Unspeakable Odds:**

**Chapter 9: Inner Voice**

**Darien's POV:**

I looked around the aisles, past old ladies finishing their shopping, trying to find something. Since I was gone, how do I know her tastes haven't changed?

And why'd I have to get **her**? I looked at the jewelry, the flower department, the clothes areas.

Nothing.

Dammit' all. I felt a vibrate in my pocket and slid my phone from the jeans, answering it.

"Hellooo?" I asked jokingly. There was a giggle at the other end.

"Hey Darien, it's Stella." I grinned.

"Hey, what's going on?"

"Not much. I'm getting off work in an hour. What about you?" I sighed.

"I'm getting my secret santa gift for a... 'friend' of mine."

"Why the sarcasm around 'friend'?"

"I don't know if I could say we're really friends. It's weird."

"Is it that girl from Ihop with the brown hair? She looked like a bitch anyways." I laughed.

"Oh, Amber? No, not her. She **is **bitchy sometimes though." Just then, my cart seemed to bump into another. "Hold on." I looked up.

"Wow Darien." I raised an eyebrow.

"Amber? What are you doing here?"

"I was getting my secret santa gift. Merry Christmas, you doo doo."

She turned on her heel and left. I sighed and returned to the phone. "Sorry, just ran into someone."

"Oh. Well, What are you doing afterwards?"

"I'll probably just go to the bar with some friends or something. Unless you wanna' do something?"

"Sure. How about we go to the bar and then dinner at your place?" I nodded.

"Sure. I'll meet you there." I hung up.

You see, there's this bar that Bruce, Malcolm, Marlin, Ziggy and I would go to awhile back. Since I've been back, we go there a lot still. Well, except Ziggy, who was still in Asia. He ended up winning his hair reality show thing and was now on a tour.

Something like that.

I ended not finding much. I'd have to think of something though. Christmas was in about a month.

I dashed out and pulled open the car door, shutting it evermore forcefully. Turning up the radio, I placed a CD in.

It's funny. I live in Japan now, and I can't even stand j-pop. Something by Sublime seemed to cut it for me.

By the time I'd gotten to the bar, Stella had already arrived. I entered, trying not to look stupid. She smiled and stood up, pecking my cheek.

"Hey. I ordered us some beers." I sighed.

"You know, I'm supposed to pay for that." She giggled. She did that a lot. Sitting down at a booth, we talked for a bit. Mostly about her and her family, then about mine. Until she brought another thing up.

"Who was that other girl you were with last week?"

Stella and I had been dating for a few weeks now, and I hadn't told her about Momo. I guess if I want to make this relationship work...

"She's just a friend. Her name's Momo." She nodded.

"Momo... that's a pretty name." I cleared my throat and shrugged.

"I think Stella is much more beautiful." She turned red and laughed, leaning on the table.

Things were going great, until...

* * *

**Momo's POV:**

"I'll take a Scotch." I said casually, leaning against the counter. Amber and Ava looked over at me.

"Well, what's up with you?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Nothing's up, Ava."

"Okay, okay." She reassured.

"Can I get a Pina Colada?" Amber asked.

"I'll take Kool-aid." We looked at Ava.

"Kool-aid?" She nodded. She was serious.

"Yup." We shrugged it off and moved to our seats. Malcolm, Bruce, Keiji, and Marlin would have joined us, but they were at this arcade. Malcolm really wanted to win this stuffed penguin.

Amber gasped quietly and covered her mouth. "Don't look now." I looked past Ava's head and my eyes widened. What was **he** doing here? And with that bitch from Ihop.

"I think Stella is much prettier." He said. I scowled and downed the scotch. Just when I was hoping not to be noticed, I caught his eyes. He flinched for a second, stuttered, then got back to his conversation.

"And what is going on?" Ava asked, utterly confused.

"Durin is on a date." I raised an eyebrow at the name 'Durin', but went along with it. Stupid Durin, stupid Fatooley.

* * *

**Keiji's POV:**

"NO DEAL, YOU STUPID!" Malcolm flinched at my yelling. He has sensitive ears, I guess.

"Okay! Okay! I said no deal!" Brucie sighed.

"Dude. You almost got a hundred tickets. If you would have said deal." Marlin hit Bruce across his bald head.

"No, man. He's only got high numbers left to get. It only increases for Little Ducky." Malcolm had beads of sweat on his face. I'd say it's kinda' hot, but no. It's not once you see what he's sweating for. He's sweating to win some penguin thing.

"COME ON MAGIC CASE! IT'S EITHER 90 OR 200! COME ON!" We all hushed at this. The chick opened the case, smiled, and the number showed.

_200 tickets_

**"YEAHHHH!"**

"200 BRO POINTS TO LITTLE DUCKY!"

Malcolm grinned as he finished collecting his tickets. "Okay, Keiji, how much is the penguin?"

"5000 tickets."

"And how long have we been here?"

"Two hours."

"And how many tickets do we have, counting the 200 I just got?"

"20o and a half." Malcolm sighed and sat down.

"Wait, why only half?"

"Because Bruce got pissed at you for calling him fat, so he bit it in half."

"Oh yeah." We sulked a little longer until an idea popped into my head.

"Okay. I'll be right back." I jumped off the stool and walked to the clerk. He had been eyeing me for a bit. I leaned on the counter. "So..." I read his name tag. "Is Kernel really your name?" He pouted.

"It's Chip. Okay?" I nodded.

"Okay. Chip, what would it take to get that stuffed penguin?"

"5000 tickets."

"And what would it take for me to get the penguin from you?" He raised an eyebrow.

"5000 tickets."

"How about a night with me? Keiji."

"5000 tickets." I sighed.

"How about a hundred bucks." He smirked.

"Deal."

"YOU GOT ME MY STUFFED PENGUIN!" Malcolm jumped up and hugged the almost life-size penguin after I came back.

"That's what Keiji's do."

* * *

**Darien's POV:**

"This food is AMAZING." Stella said as she finished her last couple bites. I shrugged.

"Store bought sure is nice, though, isn't it?" She laughed at this.

One thing I loved about Stella, was that she laughed at all my jokes. And, she never disagrees with me. We haven't fought yet.

Momo and I didn't fight as much either, but, when we did, she REALLY stuck by her opinion. She had that independent feel to her. I smiled as I thought this. I remember when we would be in her dorm with Ava, Malcolm, Amber (before she started dating Brucie and worked for Dizzy Network), Brucie, Marlin, Ziggy, Yuuki, Akemi (Before... that), Kaname, Aido (Even though he kinda' smelled), even Zero. We'd all sit there, just chilling. My arm would be around Momo, and I would sniff her hair. Not in the creepy way, it just had that coconut smell to it. I can remember it to this day.

Things back then were so... easy.

Now there's commitment, relationships, more work... and things are more personal.

Being with Momo was like a breeze. It went by so fast. I remember how stupid I acted after she dumped me before the ball, how she dated Zero for awhile after that... How we got back together at that concert at the beach. That was where I first told her I loved her. It was nice back then. Sometimes I feel like I'm missing out, but, then I think to now.

I'm technically a veteran, right? I also have a NEW amazing girlfriend, and a good job.

You wouldn't believe it, but being a male stripper was pretty rewarding with tips.

This is what I mean, I don't want to think back to back then. That's over. We went our seperate ways.

"Uh, Darien?" I looked up from the table.

"Oh, yeah?"

"I was just wondering if you wanted to... move this to the couch." I smirked and nodded, grabbing her hand and sitting on the couch with her.

I'd been able to pay for a lease on my old apartment. It reminded me of back then. I pulled her in close and kissed her. This went on for a bit until my sense of smell kicked in. I pulled away.

"Is that coconut?" She laughed and twirled her hair in her fingers.

"Oh yeah, it's this new shampoo I've been trying." I leaned back in to kiss her, but then...

_Darien, what do you think you're doing?_

Momo?! What are you doing here?

_I'm not actually here, you stupid head. I'm your concious. Or whatever._

What do you want?

_You really like this Stella chick?_

Yeah, I do. Do you have a problem?

_Real Momo wouldn't tell you that she was, but after you left, don't you think she was upset after seeing you with that Fatooley chick?_

Her name is Stella.

_Whatever. _

Why would she be upset?

_Well, you shoved your hand over her mouth to talk to that bitch. Don't you think she got a bit jealous?_

We agreed we were done! We had closure!

_How do you think Momo feels? You called her a hoe, a slut, embarressed her at your work, dumped her after having a one night stand with her, flirting with a chick RIGHT in front of her, not even a few DAYS after having some 'closure' as you call it. I wonder why she'd be upset._

Listen Mind Momo, or whatever you are, Momo and I had our end. We dated for a long time, realized things wouldn't work out, and broke up. Is that closure enough?

_Do you know what she did while you were gone? She listened to that message you left her about you still loving her OVER AND OVER. Keiji had to confiscate her phone eventually. When you slept with her, you denied the message, rejected her, and left. IN YOUR CHAPS. That just makes you look more cheap._

HEY! Walking home in those chaps was PRETTY embarressing.

_Not as embarressing as having to face her roommate, who probably heard everthing, face her other friends, or even face you._

Listen, I'm not the only one at fault here! She's the one who wanted to get into my co-workers pants.

_Well yeah, but, maybe she'd apologize if you guys were ACTUALLY on friendly terms. Have you even thought about your secret santa gift to her yet?_

I couldn't find one. And how did you know I was her secret santa?

_I'm in your mind. And Darien, I know you didn't really look. You got sidetracked by Stella, decided on nothing, and left to get in her pants, only for Momo to catch you putting your charm on her. Which works pretty well, by the way._

It does, doesn't it? But... Do you think she was upset?

_Did you even HEAR all the things you did? I mean, she probably feels bad too, for what she did, but maybe she doesn't want to face you yet._

I was being an ass.

_And by the way, when you were drunk, you let it slip how much you missed her, and all the things you wanted back._

I remember that. I do kinda' miss that.

_And why would you want some fake look-a-like bitch who agrees with everything you say because she's THAT stupid?_

Because... I don't know.

_Do you want her back Darien? Do you still love Momo?_

Yeah.

_Then you better win her back sometime. Try something on Christmas._

I will.

Christmas. I WILL get you back, Momo Takeda.

* * *

**Hey guys, serious chapter here. I want to know if any of my Unspeakable Odds readers even read this anymore...**

**But I just hope somebody reads this. Thank you Demonic Angel 7 for all of your nice reviews! I hope to get more :)**


	10. Merry Christmas!

**Return Of The Unspeakable Odds:**

**Chapter 9: Merry Christmas!**

**Darien's POV:**

"Darien!" I turned my head to find the who the female voice came from.

"Hey baby." I said, kissing Stella once she made it over. "What's up?" She held my hands and swung them back and forth.

"Listen, I was thinking..." She started, a smile on her face. "I was thinking we should move this relationship a little further."

Oh god...

"What if we went to America for the holidays? I'd like you to meet my parents." My eyes gradually grew wider as a thought ran through my head.

_W_e _were on the plane, flying back to America. This was awhile back._

_"Hey, Darien, I've been thinking..."_

_"What?"_

_"After we get back from America, I think I want you to meet **my** parents..."_

After we got back from America, I told Momo I was going into the marines. We broke up before I ever got to meet her parents. They probably DESPISE me.

"Baby?" She asked, looking into my eyes. I shook my head free of thoughts. I was gonna' have to do this.

"Listen, can we talk?" I asked.

She nodded. "Sure." She said this kind of quietly, considering the fact that I was being serious.

We sat at the nearest booth, and she smiled. "So, is there anything you want to tell me?" I nodded.

"Yeah... I don't think... we're going to work. It's over." Her mouth dropped.

"But, why?" I took it all in.

"I don't want this to go too far. I love someone else. I don't want to break your heart in the future." She pouted, I could tell she was about to cry.

"Darien, how could this not upset me?! Do you know what today is?!" A waiter came to the table.

"And, here you go. On the house. Happy birthday." He said.

The bartender had gotten to know our group, considering we went there a lot. My eyes widened.

"It's your... birthday?" She stood up and grabbed her drink, splashing it over my head.

"Asshole."

And she was gone.

There was some familiar voices in the background, and I saw a rag fall on the table. I looked up.

"Uh, I was here with Keiji... and I saw that. Sorry."

It was Momo. She stood awkwardly for a moment as Keiji pranced to the table.

"Momo! What did I say?!" She flinched.

"What?"

"Go and sit at the bar."

"Why does she need to sit at the bar?" I asked, wiping my face off.

"I'm testing to see if there's any gay guys here. Keiji needs some ass tonight. Any guy that doesn't go for Momo, is either mine, or on a date." I raised an eyebrow.

"Uh... okay." She walked away.

Keiji waited until she was gone, and sat down.

"What are you doing?!" He asked. I shrugged.

"Wiping my face from rum and coke."

"No. What I mean, is why did you dump Stella?"

"Things weren't working." He sighed a heavy hearted sigh.

"Darien, I know things were going great with you. You dumped her for someone else, didn't you?"

What was I supposed to say? I looked over to the bar. And there's one guy.

"I... I just wasn't into her. She was too perfect. She agreed with me on everything, she reminded me of..." I trailed off. Keiji smirked and looked over to the bar.

"It's Momo, isn't it?

**Momo's POV:**

"Well, hey there." A man said, sitting on the bar stool next to me.

"Hi..." I replied, propping myself on my hands.

"Are you here alone?" He asked, looking around the bar.

"Well, no. My friend is over there." I pointed over to Keiji. He looked to Darien.

"What about the other guy?"

"Just another guy."

Nodding, the guy looked over to the bartender, Sora. "Can I get this girl a beer?" Sora nodded and handed one to him.

"Can I have your name?" I asked.

"Dave. And you?"

"Momo." He smiled, handing me my beer.

"So, How close to here do you live?" I smiled.

"Listen, before you offer to get in my pants, I just drink a couple beers first?"

* * *

**A 'Couple Beers' Later**

"An' sooo, he's dating this Fatooley chick. But he's not. But I don't know. An' like, he was only dating her to make me mad. She looked A LOT like me! It's sooo weird. She's so dumb, though. I mean, he dumped me awhile ago, but... he's friends with my friends, so I can't ezzactly get away from him, and yeah."

Dave nodded. "I get the feeling your feeling." And of course. He was drunk too. "I wasn't REALLY tryin' to get into your pants. I mean, I'm not straight. I'm a curvy line." I laughed.

"I think you'd like to meet my friend, Keiji."

* * *

**The Next Morning**

"Uhhhh... Buh." I stood up and cracked my back. "Thanks for letting me crash here, Ava." She nodded, her eyes not leaving the TV.

"No problem. Why'd you decide to come here anyways?"

"Well, Amber was at Brucie's place, Keiji needed his Keiji-time with Dave, and... that's it."

"Oh, well, I'm getting my secret santa gift today, have you gotten yours?"

"No, but I'll tag along. Who'd you get?"

"Brucie. What about you?"

"Malcolm." Ava snickered.

"I dare you to buy him 'depends'." I laughed.

"Oh my god, I should. What are you getting Brucie?"

"I don't know, guy stuff? Porn? A football? A touchdown?"

"You really don't know what a touchdown is, do you?"

"I don't even..." I nodded.

"You should get him some kind of movie."

"Well, you see Momo, the only movies they have here are, 'Happy Fun Fun Tacos.'"

"What's 'Happy Fun Fun Tacos'?"

"A revised version of Marley & Me."

"How is that even..."

"I don't know." I sighed.

"Okay, lets go."

* * *

**Darien's POV:**

And here we are. We all gathered at Ava's house to exchange secret santa gifts. It was Christmas Eve, and since some people had plans, we'd decided to do it at about five. So we sat in a circle, beers in our hands, and presents ready to give. Keiji stood up.

"Okay everyone, I'll pick a name out of this hat, and whoever was their secret Santa, come and give them their gift." We all nodded in agreement as he pulled out the first name. "Okay, Ava." Keiji looked behind him and grabbed a neatly wrapped box, handing it to her. "Merry Christmas." She smiled and opened it. A sticky note sat on top of another box.

"Dear Ava, I'm glad you aren't fat anymore. Merry Christmas." She smiled.

"Thank you Keiji. I am proud to not be fat anymore either." Keiji frowned.

"You still aren't my favorite person." She sighed.

"Okayyy." She opened it and grinned, ripping the tin top off. "SWISS CHOCOLATES OH MY GOSH I LOVE YOU KEIJI!"

And she stuffed her face for the rest of the night.

"Okay, next, is Darien." I smiled as Puerto stood up. He reached into his pocket.

"Here. One dollar and spicy soft taco for a Darien." I looked at the more than half eaten and dripping with sauce, peice of tortilla, the dollar wrapped inside it. I set it in front of me.

"Oh, thank you Puerto." This got a laugh out of a few people.

"'Kay. Now, is... Brucie."

Ava stood up and handed him a wrapped box, which you could tell she couldn't wrap and had gotten angry with. "Merreh Kerstmas."

He opened it, and his eyes grew wide. "YOU GOT ME 'HAPPY FUN FUN TACOS'?!" She nodded. Brucie leaped at her. "THANK YOU!" He let go and straightened his collar. "I mean, it's cool... I guess." Amber patted his back.

"It's okay. You can watch it later." He grinned as Keiji pulled the next name out.

"Oh! Keiji! Me!" Amber stood up and handed him a coupon book. He jumped up and down. "THIS IS DISCOUNTS FOR DING DONGS! YAY FOR STRIP CLUBS! THANK YOUUUUUU!" They sat back down, and pulled the next name out.

"Momo." I stood up and handed her the box. She looked at me for a minute, then at the box, then reached for it.

"Merry Christmas." I said, smiling. She nodded, her face not changing.

"Thanks." And she opened it. It was a teddy bear.

"Remember in high school when you saw that teddy bear in the window of that antique shop? Well, I found it at a pawn shop a couple weeks ago." She nodded and set it into the box, setting it next to her.

"Thanks." Her replies were vague, but I had a feeling they'd change later.

"Okay, Malcolm." Momo stood up, and handed him a box.

"YOU GOT ME DEPENDS! YES." He looked around. "Okay, think about this you guys, you can pee on the run. But I totally wouldn't use these." She laughed.

"Merry Christmas, Malcolm." He smiled back as Keiji said the next name.

"Puerto." Amber stood up and handed him a bag of foil wrapped mexican food items. And it was a BIG bag.

"OH! TAMALES!" He dug into them immediatley as Malcolm stood up to give the last gift to Amber.

"Merry Christmas." She smiled and opened this to find a cd. A cd of the Monkees. Oh no. "See, it's the band you like!" She held back her words, but smiled.

"Thanks Malcolm, Merry Christmas."

* * *

**Momo's POV:**

"Momo, I can't leave you alone here! Are you sure you don't wanna' go to Ding Dongs with me?" I nodded.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'll buy you breakfast tomorrow." Keiji gave me a hug and left. The apartment was empty, and it was quiet. The only light in the room was the light of the fire, crackling. I sat down on the couch and wrapped myself in a blanket, putting my slippers on, and turning on the TV. I found the american channel, 'ABC family' and decided to watch that. I looked next to me at the teddy bear. Grabbing it, I hugged it close.

It wasn't much, but I was okay with it.

So there I lay, alone on Christmas as everyone was with their families. Watching TV, holding a teddy bear, and feeling lonely.

This gave me an idea.

I pulled my cell phone from the table and looked through my contacts. I'd been thinking of doing this for awhile.

I pressed dial.

_Bring.. Bring..._

"Hello?" I took in a breath.

"Hey... Zero." I could tell he was confused.

"Momo? Is that you?" I felt my eyes water.

"Yeah, it's been awhile. I just called to say... I'm sorry." He was quiet, which meant for me to continue. "I left without saying goodbye. We broke up so terribly, and... I'm sorry. It's been years... and... I remember that one day when we went to the beach house, and you left, because of me. I've been a terrible person. I'm sorry."

"Momo..."

"Zero, It's just... I hope we can be closer. I just wanted to tell you this, as a friend."

"What is it?" I smiled as tears spilled.

"Merry Christmas. I love you, Zero." He laughed quietly on the other end.

"Merry Christmas. I love you too." I smiled brighter.

"Bye."

"Bye."

And it was over. I put my phone down and felt a little weight fly off my chest. I needed closure with him. And I had a feeling Ava would be giving a call to Kaname sometime.

There was a noise outside. It was muffled voices. A lot of them. I stood up, my blanket wrapped around myself still., I shuffled through the living room to look ou the window.

What was I seeing?

Well I'll tell you. A bunch of men, wearing teddy bear suits, crossing their arms over their heads, pouts on their face, repeating over and over

"Sorry!... Sorry!" I raised an eyebrow and opened the window.

"Who are you guys?!" I yelled. They only repeated it." I closed the window and looked closely at them. They were the strippers from Darien's work.

I tied my hair into a messy bun and held the blanket closer.

What's going on?

I turned around and went to turn down the TV.

There was a knock at the door. I looked to the door, and all the yelling stopped. I wiped my eyes and walked slowly, pulling my sweatshirt down over thhe top of my yoga pants. They knocked again.

I kept my blanket close. Holding it as a barrier.

Reaching my hand close to the doorknob, I turned it, opening it, showing the snowfall. It was pretty outside. But what stood out?

Darien. He stood at the doorstep with a rose in one of his hands.

"Sorry." I rubbed my eyes. Was this really happening? I dropped the blanket and looked at the rose, slowly grabbing it.

"What is..." I smelled it, but lookeed back up at him.

"Momo... I'm sorry." I felt my heart skip a beat.

"What are you saying?" He smiled and put a hand on my waist.

"I'm saying 'I love you'." I felt forgetfullness. I foprgot all the terrible things we'd been through, and jumped forward leaning in and kissing him.

I pulled away.

"I love you, Darien." And I kissed him one more time, for a very long time. The men in the teddy bear suits all said 'sorry' one last time.

It was a Merry Christmas indeed.


End file.
